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I live in the Texas hill country with my daughter. I have never been married but I have been living in hell for 11 yrs with my boyfriend. He has been clean for 2 1/2 years. He works out of town 2 or 3 weeks out of the month.When he's home I am clean. And up until recently the moment he stepped on the plane & was on the hunt to get high. December 31 I was arrested for possession. As horrified as i was i also felt a huge since of relief!! I've tried Quitting enough times that I could no longer deny the fact I was not going to beat this on my own. And I could not bring myself to admit to others ESPECIALLY strangers that I needed help. And now I have no other choice but prison or death.Thank the Lord.And that being said I have used 3 times since then. I did not go on a binge. The first 2 times they were small amounts given to me. But this time I went and purchased my usual. I am very aware that I am only holding on by my fingernails and I am going to fall. And I am so pissed at myself & truly scared. I have been attending Celebrate Recovery since October. The week after my arrest I started on the steps. We just started step 4.I LOVE Celebrate Recovery. I know that the Lord is working inside. I have been overwhelmed with all the epiphanies & AHA moments for the last 2 weeks. But this time I didn't think twice about using. Why the hell not?! I am so very aware that I am completely out of second chances. I no longer have the leisure of risky behaviors. It is do or die or prison very literally.
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A vary wide variety. Led Zepplin, Dolly Pardon, Three Days Grace, Emenim, Nickelback, Depeche Mode, Rascal Flats, Garth & George, Voilent Femmes, Elvis, The Smiths, New Order, Black Sabbath, james Taylor, The Eagles- of course, Dixie Chicks,
I really don't care for rap so much or the top 40 hiphop stuff my daughter likes. I really like emenim though.
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Ann Rice
Count of Monte Cristo
The first 3 or 4 novels in the Left Behind Series
just about any childhood horses novels- King of the Wind, alot of The Black Stallion series- the first being the best. and of course the classic and my favorite- Black Beauty.
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May 22, 2008, 10:17 pm Thank
you
for
your
support!
Things
HAVE
gotten
better
for
me.
Funny
thing
that
week
I
found
myself
unable
to
talk
to
God....
Something
was
stopping
me....
it's
something
hard
to
describe
because it
sounds
kinda
strange...
&
it
felt
even
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