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None
Were
to
begin
this
story?
I
have
a
lot
to
say
so
let
me
start
at
a
point
that
I
remember
feeling
a
loss
of
control
that
was
new
to
me.
I
used
to
smoke
pot
daily.
When
I
got
older
it
began
to
be
a
nightly
thing
to
help
me
relax
after
work.
I
moved
away
and
the
only
marijuana
to
be
found
was
very
poor
quality
and
also
a
lot
more
expensive
than
what
I
was
used
to.
I
began
to
feel
the
need
of
more.
More
of
a
buzz
to
feel
sleepy..
Normal..
So
alcohol
started
its
way
in
my
life.
A
beer
or
two
mixed
with
my
night
seemed
to
help.
It
soon
became
a
few
shots
mixed
with
smoking.
Not
even
knowing
where
things
went
bad
I
was
mixing
a
half
pint
with
the
highest
alcohol
content
beer
I
could
find..
And
still
smoking.
Forced
move
due
to
family
emergency
put
me
back
to
the
area
with
the
marijuana
I
was
good
with.
Well
it
was
not
enough
for
me
at
all
anymore.
With
all
of
this
confusion
around
me
I
applied
for
a
job
to
where
I
couldn't
smoke
at
all
anymore.
I
needed
the
job.
Within
2
months
I
was
drinking
a
5th
every
night
and
waking
to
a
half
pint
to
stop
shaking.
Now
I'm
lost.
Lost
myself
and
now
starting
to
loose
friends
and
family.
I
was
a
mess.
In
all
this
I
had
a
wife
and
2
beautiful
daughters
who
loved
me.
I
now
have
a
very
loving
and
supporting
girlfriend
and
trying
to
win
back
trust
and
respect
of
my
daughters.
All
I
have
time
for
right
now
but
this
is
just
the
tip
of
iceberg.
A
very
long
story
short
with
the
lack
of
a
few
addictions
that
i
purposely
left
out
for
now.
If
you
read
this
thank
you
for
listening
and
I
will
complete
said
story.
Probably
over
the
course
of
10
or
so
more
blogs.
Yes
I
am
an
addict.
But
proud
to
bring
my
demons
to
light.
For
I
believe
is
a
lot
easier
for
them
to
live
in
the
dark
parts
of
heart
,
brain
and
soul.
Bring
them
to
light
and
watch
them
vanish
.
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