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The first time I ever picked up a drink, I had my first blackout. I was sixteen. Everytime I drank after that I drank to get drunk. It was not often that I drank at school. I started working after I graduated and got a bursery to study further. The moment I left home was the moment my downhill slide into the world of drugs and alcohol began. When I began to feel the heat I did the famous geographical move, hoping to leave my sordid world behind. Thing is I followed me and it got worse. Progressive! I kind of sorted me out for a while but it did not last. I got ill and had to have surgery and wow I found my drug of choice. For the next few years morphine, pethidine and heroin took my heart. During all this I never left my alcohol. I found myself moving from doctor to doctor to get what I needed. Sat in ER's all night to get my fix. Eventually landing in an ER nearly dying. The insanity of the disease. It took my sanity, self respect, my family and nearly my soul. Thank you to a Higher Power who never left me and one night after a three day binge, gave me a conscience. I told my family and got help. It was such a battle. I wanted to stay clean but I wanted to use more and I relapsed. I went back to meetings and saw my therapist regulary at the rehab. Days turned to weeks and weeks turned to years. I still have a pity party now and again but I get out of it asap. I am a person that has come from chaos and still like to have it in my life (insane). Working the steps is amazing, I am free. I am on a journey that is so incredible, I get to live JUST FOR TODAY, help suffering addicts, have people in both NA/AA who help me and have a Higher Power who has my back. Today, I am full of gratitude for the miracle of life. My life.
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The fellowship, all night coffee chats. My cat, Flidmo. Long walks on the beach. Dancing in warm summer rain. Nature. Braais(barbeques). Summer days. Cold winters.
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I don't like being told what to do. Controling people. Shopping centres.
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[This member only allows comments from his/her friends.]
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Thrillers, crime and some drama's.
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Horse riding, scuba diving.
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November 10, 2008, 7:27 pm Well,
as
the
days
creep
closer
to
my
appointment
with
the
specialist,
the
more
full
of
fear
I
get!
The
last
thing
I
need
in
my
life
right
now
is
surgery.
Part
of
me
would
rather
live
in pain.
I
know
I
am
projecting
here
and
I October 30, 2008, 3:40 am February 21, 2008, 4:15 am September 26, 2007, 2:59 am September 18, 2007, 6:34 am
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