Addiction

I AM MAT. I AVOID SERIOUSNESS AT ALL COSTS. I LIKE TO KEEP EVERYTHING AS SUPERFICIAL AS POSSIBLE SO YOU CANT HURT ME WITH MY OWN FEELINGS. YOU SEE, MY HEARTS BEEN BROKEN A FEW TIMES BY THAT CHICK MY MOTHER TRIED TO WARN ME ABOUT. SHE SAID THAT ALL WOMEN LIE, BUT THEN AGAIN, MY MOTHER WAS A WOMAN, SO SHE COULD HAVE BEEN THE LIAR. WILL YOU BE MY FRIEND

I WISH TO MEET A FLAMINGO DANCER FROM VENEZUELA NAMED MARIA WITH WHOM I CAN CHA-CHA INTO THE SUNSET

. Over-Serious Anonymous 12-Step Program 1. We admitted that we were powerless over seriousness -- that our lives had become unmanageable. 2. Came to believe that only by lightening up could we achieve a state of non-seriousness. 3. Made a decision to turn our constant self-criticism over to our sense of humor and learn to "lovingly and wholeheartedly" laugh at ourselves. 4. Decided to give ourselves a break once in a while, instead of constantly doing searching and fearless moral inventories of ourselves. 5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being that our wrongs were often in our heads. 6. Were entirely ready to accept that our characters were as good as anybody else's and possibly better than most. 7. Quit harping on our shortcomings. 8. Made of list of all persons we thought we had harmed and saw that they'd forgotten all the crap we'd blown out of proportion. 9. Quit making amends for breathing air and taking up a few square feet of the planet's surface. 10. Resigned ourselves to the fact we were going to criticize ourselves at times, but would try to stick to our guns when we knew we were right. 11. Sought through prayer and meditation to calm down and realize we're not responsible for everything. 12. Having experienced immense relief from these steps, we would try to carry this message to other over-serious people and to practice these principles in all of our affairs.

ANYTHING BY WEIRD AL, FRANK ZAPPA, FRANK SINATRA, AND FRANKY GOES TO HOLLYWOOD

ILLIAD AND ODDYSEY, HITCHIKER'S GUIDE, AND ANYTHING BY SEUSS.

STAR WARS, EASY RIDER, FEAR AND LOATHING IN LAS VEGAS, AND THE BRIDGES OF MADISON COUNTYStar Wars Cops

FOLK DANCING, MIDGET WRESTLING, NEEDLE-POINT, BREAK-DANCING, PLAYING ACCORDIAN.