Addiction

Hey Sassy,

Keep praying and take it slowly (I speak from experience) I am still rebuilding my relationship with my children and it has hills and valleys. Just love her, but be sure to love yourself as well. And, remember not to pick up any old baggage you have laid down and forgiven yourself for if you know what I mean. We can never determine when, how or if ever our children will or can ever fully forgive us. I have learned to take each opportunity given to  me with my children and take it slow , to listen and hear what they are saying. Remember the serenity prayer: The wisdom to know the difference, it seems to be the hardest part to learn and apply (at least for me). YOU seem to me a very strong woman and God never opens a door part way. God Bless you and your daughter and you will be in my prayers.

Peace,

Susan

Hi Kat, 

I am thankful that this day has come for you. One because I can only imagine the years that you have had to live with this pain in your heart.

Divorce is ugly most of the time. It would help if people would learn to act like adults. Usually if one or the other is still in love this type of situation happens.

But most children after they are grown will decide that it is time for them to judge it all for themselves. You have to know that he never thought of this little girl needing and wanting her mom. She as well as yourself has suffered.

All children want their parents. They never get over the seperation from a parent. The same sex parent is the biggest role modal in a child"s life. She needed her "mother".

But I am just going to tell you to take it slow. Let your heart lead you and not your head.

She very well may be wanting you just for what she may think you will give her. But I doubt it.

My daughters dad abandon her at six. In high school, she came to me and said she wanted to try again with him. I told her I would support her in every way. However to just be careful, she said I know mom what you mean, and I will.

They had several days "out" together. She always returned with bags full, where he took her shopping. I knew he was trying to buy her. But I knew my daughter.She was in the 11th grade.

Finally one evening she returned home,crying her heart out. Kat I wanted to kill him. I thought you no good piece of sh*t.  I gave my daughter to your trust and once again you tore her to pieces. Never and I mean never again will I allow this, I was thinking all of this as I held my baby in my arms.

But I found out I raised a daughter who was so much like her mother. Because she said "Mom he doesn't love me, or want me". He took be and spend over 200.00 dollars on me tonight. and I left it with him when he told me to take "my stuff". I said no thank you. I am not for sale, this wasn't about money dad.

This was about me needing the man that is my dad , to love me. You can't blame mom anymore, because I know the truth now. You never loved any of us.

She told me that he doesn't want me mom. He wants "YOU", this was years after I had divorced him, At least ten years. She said he didn't ever talk about what he and her could do together. It was always maybe you could get your mother to meet us for lunch etc, so we can talk about your future. It was always about me and not her.

She knew he only was using her to try to get me back. She said she told him my mother would never meet with you for any reason. He had told her he would always love me. She told him well that is sad for you because she doesn't and never will love you again. But you deserve it because I am your daughter and you have never loved me.

That is when he threw up to her the money he spend, and why she left the bags with him. Telling him I never needed none of that either. My mom provides very well for me. I had never been more proud of my daughter then I was that day.

She has never seen him again and says she never wants too. She is now just about 22.

So take your time. Knowing that in the end she needs her mom. But she may be where my daughter was. Or she may be in the frame of mind that my ex was in.

You know I want this for you so much. I am here to support you babe, I only pray it is the day you have prayed for.

love ya,

Paris