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"Live and let Live."

Mood: Mellow
Date: Dec. 23, 2007
I'm an (double vision) alcoholic...0_o As an AA member and onetime strong atheist I thought that I would not be able to utilize the 12 steps as part of my recovery. I would go to the meetings and just sit-in and not participate in the sharing. I thought that because I don't work the steps I really had nothing to contribute for those who work the steps. Because my coping with alcoholism was gleaned from a psychological therapy modality none in the meeting could relate to my share. Over time, as I sat through numerous meetings I started to soften my stance on spiritual principals. I adopted a non-theist view as a Buddhist. Still, I kept silent in meetings, choosing to keep my new found spirituality private. Eventually I stopped going to meetings and went to college in an effort to learn about alcohol dependence treatment and get a certificate as an addiction counselor. That would be my program for staying sober. For some time that worked. I felt that my life had a purpose and was happy in my sobriety. However I was isolating a lot, I stopped my mental illness treatment and tried to face many stressors alone. I also quit my spiritual practice too. I went out. When I came back to treatment and living in a sober boarding house I went back to AA meetings. Still I didn't feel apart of AA but thought I would give the program a try. I found a copy of AA Comes of Age and came across this:

AA Comes of Age:
"A minister in Thailand wrote, "We took A.A.'s Twelve Steps to the largest Buddhist monastry in this province, and the head priest said, `Why these Steps are fine! For us Buddhists, it might be slightly more acceptable if you had inserted the word `good' in your Steps instead of `God'. Nevertheless, you say that it is God as you understand Him, and that must certainly include the good. Yes, A.A.'s Twelve Steps will surely be accepted by Buddhists around here". (p. 81)

I could accept being a Buddhist and work a 12 step AA program that has helped many of the people I heard share in the meetings. I am now beginning to work the steps with my understanding of a power greater than myself: Good or as I like to call it, The Higher Power of being beneficial (good) to all beings, the earth and myself. I relies I know only a little, but with that I can participate with others inside and outside of meetings as we share the common ground of seeking and practicing a spiritual 12 step solution to a spiritual malady: a illness called alcoholism.

My name is Will and I'm an (double vision) alcoholic. Thank you for being here with me today.


From: Theresa
December 23, 2007, 9:39 pm
Thanks for sharing!!!


Even if your hands are shakin...Say what you need to say